Respect Your Elders — 1 Timothy 5-6

0:00 Today, we're going to be continuing our series in first Timothy. And I am covering chapter five. And chapter five, just to summon in as few words as possible, is to respect your elders. And, you know, that starts to mean more to me as I get older. You know, Friday night I slept kind of funny, and Saturday morning I woke up with a crick in my neck, and it's still there.

0:39 And when I was 20, I would have shooken that off, and about ten minutes later I would have been okay. But things start to happen as you get older. You know, I have hair starting to grow out of my ears and things like that. I gotta trim that, and it's getting old. So I really need to respect my elders, both the men and the women, and it's really important.

0:59 It's an important part of Christian testimony, and it is mentioned quite a bit in the New Testament about caring for widows, particularly caring for orphans, and instructions about elders and how we are to have respect for them, the elders both in age and elders in office. Let's begin with reading through our chapter, so we have a general sense of the context here. First Timothy chapter five. Do not sharply rebuke an older man, but rather appeal to him as a father, to the younger men as brothers, the older women as mothers, and the younger women as sisters in all purity. Honor widows who are widows indeed, but if any widow widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family, and to make some return to their parents, for this is acceptable in the sight of God.

1:56 Now she who is a widow indeed, and who has been left alone, has fixed her hope on God and continues in entreaties and prayers night and day. But she who gives herself to wanton pleasure is dead even while she lives. Prescribe these things as well, so that they may be above reproach. But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. Let a widow be put on the list only if she is not less than 60 years old, having been the wife of one man, having a reputation for good works, and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work, but refused to put younger widows on the list for when they feel sensual desires and disregard of Christ, they want to get married, thus incurring condemnation because they have set aside their previous pledge.

2:52 At the same time, they also learn to be idle as they go around from house to house, and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention. Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach, for some have already turned aside to follow Satan. If any woman who is a believer has dependent widows, let her assist them, and let not the church be burdened so that it may assist those who are widows indeed. Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching. For the scripture says, you shall not muzzle the ox while he is threshing, and the laborer is worthy of his wages.

4:01 No longer drink water exclusively, but use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments. The sins of some men are quite evident, going before them to judgment. For others, their sins follow after. Likewise also, deeds that are good are quite evident, and those which are otherwise cannot be concealed. This chapter contains some of Paul's instructions to Timothy as a younger leader in his church regarding various members of his congregation.

4:37 He starts members of the church in general, how Timothy is to counsel them as his own family and exhorting them accordingly. We have a major section here that is devoted to widows, and then another section for elders. And then Paul gives Timothy a very solemn charge to be free from prejudice and partiality as he goes about these duties. He is also cautious. Paul reminds Timothy also to be cautious about those who are commended, being careful to keep himself pure from other sins.

5:13 And it concludes with the reminder that both sins and good works will eventually become evident, those which are not plainly seen. Starting in verses one and two, he talks specifically about rebuking or or correcting those in the assembly. And first, he he mentions the the older man. And elders here, again, are... Can be, elders in age and and elders in the office as well.

5:47 And as Timothy, were the situation to arise where correction is needed, Paul's trying to to help Timothy understand there is a right way to do things, and there's a ineffective way to do things. And part of an elder's job is is correcting. That that is part of that office, and it's probably a less pleasing part of the office, I imagine. And rebukes are not all created equal. So Paul is spelling out for Timothy that when it is when it is in the case of an elder, that he should be very careful about it.

6:31 And and elders are due, a lot of respect. They they are and respect must be had for the dignity of their position and also their age and years and and their knowledge and their their wisdom. And respect must be had. And and the rebukes... The the Greek word here rebuke is actually a a word that that comes from the the word to actually physically strike.

6:56 There's a lot of different words for for the term rebuke, but it's certainly not supposed to be a sharp reprimand. It's supposed to be encouraging. So if if there was a a situation where this was required, it's to do it as you would to your own father, with with encouragement and and treating. Not as a sharp... You're you're in the wrong and and not not in a magisterial way and not sharply, but as you would your own father.

8:05 It's not seeking to to to pick out every little thing, not that part of brothers, but we want God's best for you. Elder women, as mothers. Elder women should be rebuked as mothers with all the dignity, all of the love, and the respect that is due just as you would your own mother. And younger women as you would your sister. Not the sister that you would bicker with, but the sister that you love.

8:36 The younger sister that you love and want to see God's best. And for for Timothy, as a as a male leader in the church, as he's responsible for the younger women, to also act, of course, in all purity and in ways that are above any and all reproach. So there's a lot of meekness needed when it comes time to reprove those who actually... Who who need it and and need a little steering and a little bit of direction towards God's holiness. This next large section about widows, specifically, of course, in the New Testament, there was no Social Security or Medicaid or Medicare or any of the government assistance programs that we have now.

9:26 But there was this... An especially vulnerable vulnerable group in the church, and those were the elderly widows who did not have support of a husband or grown children and had no means to support themselves. Those are the ones that they... That are described as truly widows. And there's instruction here that...

9:48 And and guidelines for how the church should support elderly widows who truly deserve it. And and Paul sets out quite a bit of of description because the church should not support any and all widows. So we have... He he talks about the true widows, and then there's the other types of widows, those who have children or grandchildren. And in these cases, the children or grandchildren are to practice very, very practical godliness in caring for the dependents, the dependent widows in their own family and household.

10:30 It's a very way of showing practical godliness. In James chapter two, he mentions this as well, And that piety begins in the home, and that we have a responsibility to care for those in our own family, our our mothers or or fathers, if they were widowers, and and those that don't have a means of support. That that duty falls on the children first. If considered a true widow, the type that has no other means for support, she can be supported by the local church since she has lost a husband and and has to trust God for her needs. But that's not all.

11:14 There are other conditions here that are spelled out. She must, have led a type of life that honored God, that honored the Lord, and served the church, and and Paul gives some specific examples in a little bit. In contrast to this type of widow is the widow in verse six who is more given to pleasure. And we can take from this context that she is probably a legitimate Christian, but perhaps one who has backslidden or or one who has become a little bit more occupied with the worldly things. And she...

11:54 When the the term is dead while she lives, is probably talking about she's she's dead as far as her communion with God and and her usefulness for him is concerned. And so Timothy is to warn such widows against living in this way, and, obviously, such a widow, should not be supported by the church because the church would be condoning that behavior by that support. Paul reminds Timothy to teach all of these things in verse seven, so that they may be above reproach, so that all of those in the congregation are aware and know what is expected of them, and what is their reasonable act of service. But if anyone does not provide for his own, verse eight, and especially for those of his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. In the very strongest terms, Paul is is pleading with Timothy and emphasizing the responsibility that a man has to provide for his own.

13:36 It's a very strong admonition. And we could add here that we have an example from the Lord Jesus himself when at Calvary, he looked at his mother and said, behold your son to the apostle John. And he said, the apostle John, behold your mother. And and Christ made certain that his mother was cared for when he was gone. And we have an ultimate example of that.

13:59 And if Christ did it, then that is what we are called to do. Matt Henry said this in his commentary, observe, charity misplaced is a great hindrance to true charity. There should be prudence in the choice of the objects of charity that it may not be thrown away upon those who are not properly so, that there may be more for those who are real objects of charity. It's a reminder to be very careful both as an individual, but also as the church is distributing funds, that that we are giving those funds to those who truly need it, who truly require it, and that those who are worthy. Paul, beginning in verse nine, now lists out a set of criteria for the widows who are to receive financial assistance from the church, those who don't have other support, but they also should have had a life that honored the Lord.

15:05 So do not let a widow 60 be taken into the number. The idea here is that if she's 60, she could either support herself in some ways or get remarried, and so wouldn't need to be supported by the church. They should be well reported for good works, having a reputation for good works. Verse 10. If she has diligently followed, these these widows who have, been the wife of one man, if she has brought up children, shown hospitality to strangers, washed the saints' feet, assisted those in distress, you get the idea.

15:44 This is the kind of... It's not that she has to follow every one of those to the letter, I think. We don't wash the saint's feet literally today. But perhaps in a spiritual context, or you you get the idea that we're looking for a widow who has served the Lord in her life, and served the Lord in her family. And when her husband has passed, and she hasn't really means for support, and she's over 60, this is the type of widow that could be supported by the church.

16:14 Another part of of this is that younger widows were not to be added because they would have a greater desire to remarry. Not that this is wrong in and of itself. In verse 14, this is Paul's general recommendation for them. But the issue here is that the desire to remarry for a younger widow could be so strong at times that she may even marry an unbeliever. In verse 11, when they feel sensual desires and disregard of Christ, they want to get married, thus incurring condemnation because they have set aside their previous pledge.

16:54 And the the caution here and Paul's warning is that the the young widow is is... There's there's a tendency for her to... Because she's still younger and wants to remarry that she would set aside Christ to to remarry an unbelieving man. And the condemnation here, of course, would not mean eternal condemnation, verse 12, but simply that there's a judgment involved for having left her faith. At one time, she professed loyalty and devotion to Christ, but now when this opportunity comes to marry an unbeliever, she sets Christ aside.

17:35 And it is not a criticism for marrying. This is what Paul actually is encouraging in verse 14, but the issue is with the potential for spiritual decline. And it particularly as it relates to the church's testimony because if the church was supporting her financially through all of this, it hurts the testimony. And in verse 13, at the same time, they also learn to be idle as they go around from house to house, and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies talking about things not proper mention. Idleness is the devil's workshop.

18:44 And he... Paul concludes this by saying, therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, keep busy. And and this would be the idea... The the better idea for the younger widow who has lost her husband. But if any woman, verse 16, who is a believer has dependent widows, let her assist them, and let not the church be burdened, so that it may assist those who are widows indeed.

19:10 So he's driving us home again that if you have someone in your family who needs support, it is your responsibility to do that. It's not the church's responsibility. It's only when someone is truly without means of any other support from the family, and they have shown and lived a godly life that they can be supported in such a way. Beginning in verse 17, we we have a new section here about elders. Now, since it's football season, and we can have football analogies.

19:51 So when you're when you're beginning a play, and the ball is snapped, and the quarterback has the ball, and and the receivers are running down the field, right, the quarterback finds his receiver, throws the ball, and there's a defender on the other team who just keeps running head on and knocks the guy down. And that, of course, is personal foul, roughing passer, 15 yard penalty, automatic first down. That's a penalty because the quarterback has already done his job. He's thrown the ball. He's not he's not in possession of it.

20:34 He's he's done his job, and he still got tackled for it. He doesn't even have the ball anymore. That's why that's that's that's such a bad penalty. Part of the reasons. I won't...

20:47 I'll stop it here. But the idea that we're getting to in this section, and about being respectful to our elders and being careful in how we admonish them, careful in how we treat them, and some general guidelines, is because elders have a lot on their shoulders. They have a lot on their plate. They have a lot of responsibility. And I think, me included, it's easy to forget about those things.

21:20 And it's easy to take that for granted. And when we have hardworking elders who are doing their job to the best that they can, and then we still find ways to complain or gripe, or or even worse, make some kind of unfounded accusation against them. You know, what what is that really doing? What is that really doing? And so there's there's some instruction here about how we are to treat our elders.

22:25 Elders can also not exercise their right to financial support. The apostle Paul did not command a salary. If we look at first Corinthians chapter nine, there's a large section devoted to it there, and also in Galatians chapter six that... And and the idea is a worker is is due his wages, and a... You know, if if you were to do a job or you you go to work, a pat in the back and a nice job doesn't really cut it for you, does it?

22:52 You you you want the paycheck. And, you know, how many of of us don't even do that for our elders who work hard? How many of us don't even regularly give them the pat on the back and say nice job? And this is... This was very humbling this week, for me particularly.

23:12 We have two of our elders here this morning. And this is an area that I need particularly bit of growth in because they could tell you the last time I did any of these things for them. And then let me tell you, it's been a long time to give you a hint. And it's very humbling to say, I have taken our elders here for granted and don't express my my gratitude and appreciation and respect for them in a way that I should. And I feel that this has been mentioned from this pulpit several times over the last several months.

23:48 I know I have heard it quite a bit recently, and I I think it's the Holy Spirit giving all of us a bit of admonishment here. Perhaps you are naturally gifted in that area, and perhaps you are already doing that. But then for the rest of us, the charge for you is, are you really... Are are we are we appreciative of our elders? And do we let them know that in any way?

24:12 Whether it is just by saying thank you, if it's by writing a note, or even something else, giving them some kind of gift as a token of appreciation for their service. Because it's hard, folks. It's hard. And I I don't think most of us really realize or or or enter in to how important of a job that is and how much responsibility is on their shoulders and and how many hours of sleep are lost every night in that in that job and carrying out that duty. The worker is due his wages.

24:53 And as we get to 1920, Paul lays down some some guidelines about if there were a situation where an elder were in the wrong or sinning in some way. Now Paul hits a balance here between... On one side, you could believe every negative thing that was ever said about an elder and, you know, and acting accordingly. On the other side, treating an elder as if they could possibly do no wrong and masking over or trying to hide obvious sins. And so they're they're they're wrong on both accounts, and there is something in the middle that is to be done.

25:41 Berkeley put it this way, nothing does more harm than when some people are treated as if they could do no wrong, and others as if they could do no right. Clark said this, the reason of this difference is evident that those business it is to correct others will usually have many enemies. Great caution, therefore, should be used in admitting accusations against such persons. Do not receive an accusation against an elder except on the basis of two or three witnesses. To those who continue in sin, rebuke in the presence of all, so that the rest also may be fearful of sinning.

26:18 So there must actually be an accusation, not not this little bit of gossip or this little bit of complaining about something that they did. Anyone in a position of leadership can't please everyone. And a lot of us have, perhaps even been in that sort of situation, at work, or in some other social social situation, and and you're left with making a decision. You know you can't please everyone with that decision. It's it's impossible to do, and it's impossible still in the church.

26:49 So we're not talking about these little these little things, but we're talking about an actual accusation that contains a certain charge. And then it would be a charge that is supported by two or three credible people, not just people who have also heard about this thing, but people who have witnessed it. We have to have actual witnesses, and this accusation will be brought to the elder so the accused can face the accusers face to face. And and that, you know, the the... And part of this is because before anything is done or anything is spread that would blemish an elder's reputation, you we have...

27:26 There there should be great care taken that this alleged accusation be well proven, that we can prove this beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is what's going on. Spurgeon, I like this, in his book, lectures to my students, had some instructions. And he said, when people come to a leader with gossip, he, the leader, should say, well, all of this is very important, and I need to give it my full attention. But my memory isn't so good, and I have a lot to think about. Can you write it all down for me?

28:01 This will take care of it because they won't want to write down their gossip. However however, if a leader were to be able to be proven of being in the wrong, it should be done publicly to impress upon everyone the seriousness of sin, especially in connection with Christian service and being in a leadership position, and to serve as a strong deterrent in the lives of the rest of the congregation. It's important that everyone in the congregation understand that leadership in the church doesn't shield one from accountability, but makes them all the more accountable. And so we should be very careful in what we even... What we entertain or what we think about our elders.

28:49 They do work very hard, and they try very hard. And it is a a very demanding work and responsibility that they have been placed to to shepherd the flock. And we should be very careful in what we hear and how we act so that we are holding them in in very high esteem and respect that is due them for their position. As Paul continues to Timothy about carrying out general discipline in the church, he has strong admonitions here. Verse 21, I solemnly charge you in the presence of God and of Christ Jesus and of his chosen angels to maintain these principles without bias, doing nothing in a spirit of partiality.

30:20 There's emphasis on this again in James in James chapter two, and also Galatians three. And we should be very careful about exercising any judgment in the church, and that it should always be without prejudice and partiality. Clark put it this way, do not treat any man in religious matters according to the rank he holds in life or according to any personal attachment thou mayest have for him. Every man should be dealt with in the church as he will be dealt with at the judgment seat of Christ. So if we think about how...

30:56 If we think about Christ being our judge, and being the ultimate judge, and being the perfect judge, it's the reminder that we need to be thinking of the things of the Lord and studying the scripture accordingly, and we're disciplined needing to be taken. That we take it as we know Christ would without bias, without prejudice, and that we're not letting any of our own natural fleshly ways of judging interfere. Verse 22, do not lay hands upon anyone too hastily and thus share responsibility for the sins of others. Keep yourself free from sin. This is speaking about commending new new men for the ministry.

31:48 And the the fear was that you have someone come into the assembly who is perhaps well known or his family was well known. And so he comes in to be a part of your fellowship and before his qualities have really been shown, we place him in a position of responsibility or even appoint him as an elder. And the caution here is to take your time. Don't do that. But to let let a man prove himself and and to not be hasty about making these decisions.

32:26 There shouldn't be a rush, and time should season a man and his ministry. And since the ministry is recognizing God's calling, it's all the more reason to not be in a hurry. And and time should be given to allow gifts to demonstrate themselves. And it isn't uncommon for a younger man to be impatient in the ministry. He wants to do great things for the Lord, and is anxious for the elders to commend him and and get him going.

32:56 But there's danger if anyone wants to give themselves fully to the service of the Lord. There's a couple of motivations. One could be that they are more concerned with the image and the title, and how it appears to others than with the actual substance, and what they are... Or what they can really be doing for the Lord right now. Do not lay hands upon anyone hastily.

33:42 Likewise, also, deeds that are good are quite evident in those which are otherwise cannot be concealed. Timothy's stomach ailments, maybe, might have been because he was in a leadership position in the church. Maybe Paul knew that he was gonna have have some physical problems as a result of being in a leadership position. It's a tough work, folks. It really is.

34:12 And and so Paul is is saying that you can... He's he's permitting medicinal use of of things to help his stomach ailment. And verses twenty four and twenty five, again, driving the point home that we shouldn't be too quick to judge others. There are evil deeds that are visible now. There are evil deeds that will only be shown later.

34:40 There are good deeds that people see now, and there are the good deeds that no one sees until later. And that we in the church should never be quick to assign someone, some kind of quality, but rather allow time to show that true character. To wrap to wrap this, chapter six verses one and two kind of belong with chapter five. There's a similar admonitions here regarding servants, or slaves in in serving their masters. Let all who are under the yoke as slaves regard their own masters as worthy of all honor.

35:27 Same kind of principles here. Servants to a believing servant, even if you had an unbelieving master, that you should regard them with respect, and that you should work hard and labor hard for them. We're doing it for the Lord. But also, a believing servant who had a believing master to still hold them as that's their position because the tendency could be for, well, we're both brothers in Christ. Right?

35:56 So are we equals? You know, there were still masters and and servants. I mean, we can apply this even to the workplace now. Even if you had a boss who was a believer, does that mean you don't respect them? Of course not.

36:10 They are still your boss, and you have to show them that respect and behave towards them in a way that honors Christ. So in closing, a couple of things. My... You know, an admonition for you this week could be to pray for your elders, honestly, truly. Thank them.

36:32 Maybe write them a note of encouragement. Think about how heavy that weight is and the responsibility that they have for us and the care that they take of us. And how can how can you make their burden lighter? How can we... How can I make the burden lighter?

36:50 You know, can we affirm the strengths that we see in the leadership? Can we thank them? Can we be on our guards against any kind of complaining that we hear about it and not entertain things that really shouldn't be entertained? We need wisdom in discerning what is most helpful for our family members that are in need. It's probably not best to to bail someone out repeatedly, or to condone the irresponsible use of money, but we need to have compassion on our family members and do our best to make sure that their needs are met so that they're not burdened by the church.

37:46 Heavenly father, we come to you again. We thank you for this time that we've had to open your word. We thank you for what your scripture teaches us, and and the rules that it has for us, and and the the directions for how we are to live a life worthy of your calling and to be calling your children. We ask for your help in this thing. We confess that we fall so short in so many areas.

38:08 We all have weaknesses, and we ask that you expose those weaknesses to us and give us the grace and help us as we strive to work harder and to be conformed to the image of your son. We ask for your blessing on the remainder of our day and as we return to our homes. In Christ Jesus' name, amen.